I love sleep.
My life has a tendency to fall apart when I'm awake.
Welcome to The Simple Things, a newsletter inspired by one of my favorite Oscar Wilde quotes. Here’s where ask myself the tough questions like “Do I really need another Oxford button up?”, “Should I go back to a lob haircut?”, and “Should I finally commit to getting a tattoo on my arm?”
Today’s titular quote is most often attributed to Ernest Hemingway, but I (and many Hemingway scholars/groupies) find it dubious. That still doesn’t diminish the truth and relatability of the statement.
I tend to ramble, so you might have to expand this email to avoid missing anything. If you enjoy reading this newsletter, please let me know by hitting the heart button or subscribing!
New Years resolutions. Blegh. Just the word alone makes me feel like I’m setting myself up for failure. Resolutions feel so absolute, inflexible, and attached to some inevitable punishment or shame. On the other hand, More/Less lists feel more natural, human, and much more forgiving. After all, it’s okay to goof up sometimes because there’s always a chance to do better. Here’s mine for 2024, which I imagine will continue to grow:
More
Routine outings, like getting coffee by my pilates studio or picking up bread/pastries from my favorite shop.
Time at the cabin and exploring the area
Tenderness
Reading - My 2023 goal was read 30 books, and I ended up reading 50. I’m going to shoot for 60 books in 2024.
Writing - Specifically non-client related work
Playing hooky
Meeting new people
Growth
Vegetables
Abandon
Cooking
Less
Productivity
Agreeing to things or people that don’t enrich me
Perfection
Irritability
Shoe and denim purchases
Cocktails
Screentime
Impulse purchases
Sugar
Apologizing
Waiting for validation
Something to consider about change, excerpted from Maybe You Should Talk to Someone by Lori Gottlieb:
People procrastinate or self-sabotage as a way to stave off change — even positive change — because they’re reluctant to give something up without knowing what they’ll get in its place. The hiccup at this stage is that change involves the loss of the old and the anxiety of the new. Although maddening for friends and partners to witness, this hamster wheel is part of the process; people need to do the same thing over and over a seemingly ridiculous number of times before they’re ready to change.
And something to ask yourself while embarking on adventures in 2024: Will this enlarge me or diminish me? [Austin Kleon]
This year’s Christmas dinner menu featured Ina’s brisket with onions and leeks, Ottolenghi’s wilted spinach with saffron yogurt and golden raisins, Emily’s English roasted potatoes, and
‘s upside down salty sticky toffee pudding served with vanilla ice cream. It was an ambitious undertaking, but I planned like a motherfucker with my mise and row of to do lists taped on the kitchen counter like an extra from an episode of The Bear. I think it turned out well, since everyone was too busy eating to talk. Of course when I asked Nancy what she thought, she said “You did too much”, which we all know is Chinese mom-speak for “Everything was delicious. Thank you.”James Baldwin is always a good idea and this conversation between him and Maya Angelou is a treat. [YouTube, via Anne Friedman Weekly]
This cheeky poem by Jane Kenyon:
The Shirt
The shirt touches his neck
and smooths over his back.
It slides down his sides.
It even goes down below his belt —
down into his pants.
Lucky shirt.
The motivation behind everything I do, via
:
Cryonceaweek.com will show you a tear-inducing video so you can cry whenever you want, wherever you want. After all, science says crying once a week can lead to a stress-free life.
Am inspired to sign off all my communiqués with “I think about you even when I’m not thinking”:
Both lovely posts were found via
.Nick Cave’s tenderhearted response to an atheist who is conflicted about a request to pray for his cancer-afflicted friend and his nonreligious integrity [The Red Hand Files]:
I can’t think of an act more generous than an atheist at prayer, who temporarily puts aside their disbelief in a god in order to bring comfort to a friend. Loosening your position for a moment, and doing something difficult because it has been asked of you by someone you care for, demonstrates a confidence in your beliefs, and shows that they are not so prideful or absolutist that they manifest into a smallness of being. Of course, to some this act will seem intellectually dishonest, a sham and a lie, but to others it will appear as the purest kindness, where heart eclipses mind, a true and complete gesture of what it means to love somebody.
Fancy kitchen tools made in Japan. [Gestura]
“When it came to disinheritance, I had learned mainly this so far: all families are tragedies.” A tale of modern love from the NYTimes.
As a big fan of the martini with an increasingly low ABV tolerance (hello mid-30s!), I’m all for the 50-50 martini. If your bartender gives you a raised eyebrow, just tell them it’s 1 part gin (or vodka) and 1 part vermouth. [Food & Wine]
One of my recent impulse purchases (and hopefully the last one of the year) is the Frostbuddy. It’s a double-walled insulated stainless steel mug that holds most to-go drinks of any size — smedium, large, whatever — and keeps it hot or cold in its original container. You can still use it as a regular insulated mug as well. Don’t ask me why I got it, I just knew I needed it. [Amazon]
I also needed these edamame-shaped bottle cleaners, too. [Amazon]
For those of you who have large bottles that won’t fit into your car cup holders, there’s an adapter for that. [Amazon]
Hard to believe these calm, rustic interiors the interiors of an Atlanta home by designer Stan Dixon and not a renovated farmhouse in Europe. [House & Garden UK]
Goblin Tools aims to break down to-do lists in a manageable way for neurodivergent folks.
I love this handmade leather bag that can be worn as a backpack or a tote. I can’t decide between camel, cordovan, or green. [Lotuff Leather]
How to pee in a bodysuit. Is it just me or do we not talk about this enough? [The Cut]
It’s been almost a week since I’ve watched Saltburn on Prime and I still can’t decide if I liked it or not. It was wicked, visceral, darkly hilarious, and at some parts, utterly disgusting. So I think I enjoyed it.
Maybe you know a little human who would like to keep his best friend closest to his heart? If so, this sweatsuit might be perfect. [All Small Co]
Little pockets of joy still exist on the interwebs if you know where to look for them and
is one of them. Her EOY round up of passions from herself and others is just a pleasure to read on an overcast day.The Commons Social Change Library has over 1000 educational resources on topics like campaign strategy, community organizing, justice and diversity, and more. Everything is free, digital, and directly available.
Faircado is designed to help shoppers find the the internet’s best pre-owned deals.
Locavore was started by the former owner of CW Enterprise to create a digital directory of independent shops in NYC.
Sourhouse is a little cozy home for your pandemic-born starter. RIP Frances. (via
)Let’s get these folks their own time slot on Bravo. SO MUCH DRAMA. I LOVE IT. [Tiktok]
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This underrated yet stinging barb from Fran Lebovitz via
: “The level of comfort that people seem to feel they need is like a level of comfort that you would have while taking a bubble bath. You don’t need to be that comfortable all the time.” [The Cut]Beep boop beep to this robot mini bar:
Since 2016, Columbia has recognized the rights of animals as “feeling beings” and entitled to legal protection of their wellbeing. This year, a man sued his ex-wife for regular visitation rights and won after his lawyers argued that his dog, Simona, was part of his “multispecies family” and on the rare occasion that the man’s ex-wife allowed him to visit Simona, the dog was “emotionally affected” when he had to leave. Just further confirmation of what we already know: Our dogs are our family. [via
]Why I Wake Early by Mary Oliver
Hello, sun in my face.
Hello, you who make the morning
and spread it over the fields
and into the faces of the tulips
and the nodding morning glories,
and into the windows of, even, the
miserable and crotchety—
best preacher that ever was,
dear star, that just happens
to be where you are in the universe
to keep us from ever-darkness,
to ease us with warm touching,
to hold us in the great hands of light—
good morning, good morning, good morning.
Watch, now, how I start the day
in happiness, in kindness.
Yes yes yes!
Ina’s brisket recipe is so good! I made it for multiple Rosh Hashanahs, sometimes adding in some pomegranate syrup.