Welcome to The Simple Things, a newsletter inspired by one of my favorite Oscar Wilde quotes. Here’s where I tell you the meaning of life, but I can’t remember what it is because I got distracted by a shiny new thing.
Today’s titular quote is from writer and Dear Sugar life coach Cheryl Strayed.
There’s a lot of Substacks requiring paid subscriptions, and I totally support that (my AMEX bill will back me up on this)! But that’s not something I want to do. I’m grateful for the opportunity to take up a bit of space in your inbox and attention span. If you enjoy reading this and want to support, please consider subscribing, sharing, and/or recommending my posts. Please and thank you!
I started adding a pinch of salt to my morning coffee in addition to my usual 2 sugars and milk after reading this. It really does cut down on the bitterness! [Bon Appetit]
Oh hello linen jacket with gorgeous flowers. Made by Aprés Ski, a Barcelona-based studio that makes meticulously handstitched clothes, hats, vests, and totes.
Is it just me or do these vintage fleeces seem reasonably priced compared to other vintage shops? [Cloak Vintage]
I’m here to tell you that Santa Maria Novella makes scented terracotta pomegranates. These would make wonderful housewarming or hostess gifts. You’re welcome.
Oh look at the shape of this bowl! It looks like a coffee filter, but it looks like the perfect vessel for dinner popcorn. [The Sette]
Do you ever read something someone else wrote and you feel both angry you didn’t come up with it first and relieved you’re not the only one who sees the world that way? Maybe it’s just me, but here are a few things (mostly from Letters of Note) that I really loved: “A Library is Many Things” + How to Respond to a White Supremacist + The best “up yours” I’ve ever had the pleasure to come across.
I found myself banging my head against my desk in total frustration and agreement with this essay by internet princess. She correctly writes, "Isolation is easy, living is hard." Of course it's much more comforting to live in your own world without having to answer to other people. Of course human relationships are categorically complicated and difficult. But if we turn away from the messiness, we're denying ourselves the joy of experiencing all the technicolor emotions we have the privilege of feeling. Joy is a choice. And this is the part where I started raise my hands like I’m at a John Mayer concert:
"There is one way to reject this: make the choice to love someone who is as flawed as you are. One of the most remarkable pleasures that love has to offer, in fact, is the feeling of meeting someone who is scarred and beat up and bruised, too emotional or not emotional enough or oscillating wildly between the two, and offering to love them enough to help them get better (and, of course, to have them do the same to you). To grow beside a friend or lover, knowing that you will poke and prod at each other as you take shape, but unafraid of the resulting scar tissue — this is the good stuff."
“Movies are so rarely great art that if we cannot appreciate great trash, we have very little reason to be interested in them.” - Pauline Kael, former Film Critic for The New Yorker. Thanks for introducing me to her, P.
A reminder that another film critic, Roger Ebert, loved his rice cooker so much, he wrote a cookbook. [Amazon]
I think it’s no secret that I have a co-dependent relationship with my Zojirushi rice cooker, but there’s a special place in my heart for the iconic Ta Tung. We had one when we were living in Toronto and it was an absolute workhorse (e.g.). Yun Hai in Brooklyn is selling various sizes in cheery red and green colors. As well as the mini ones that can be used as steaming containers or tchotchkes. They’re currently sold out but you can sign up to be notified when they’re back in stock here.
FOUND: Kewpie Kimchi Mayo! Well technically it’s SSK Kimchi Mayo, which is why I had trouble finding it in the first place. Compared to the kimchi mayo by Lucky Foods, it tastes creamier and has a milder kimchi flavor. Plus the classic squeeze bottle makes it easy to put on everything. If you’re looking for a spicier mayo, go with the Lucky Foods one. [Nijiya Market]
KO Studio is a women-founded boxing brand with merch that go beyond the hot pink Everlast gloves (I hate mine).
Real footage of me having an emotional breakdown. [Twitter]
I realized "discipline" is just "taking care of Future Self regularly and with intention" and it made it easier to do things like clean or pack my work bag the night before because the purpose was much more clear.
- Karen Ho
This house in the Cotswolds is just lovely. [House & Garden UK]
“The best remedy for a bruised heart is not, as so many people think, repose upon a manly bosom. Much more efficacious are honest work, physical activity, and the sudden acquisition of wealth.” - Dorothy Sayers, Have His Carcase
These pet portraits are made of felt and are incredibly uncanny. [Instagram]
These sink caddies are made with a material that absorbs water, preventing gunk buildup. Want one for my kitchen sink and every bathroom in my house. [Dorai Home]
“Sometimes when you’re in a relationship, sex is like a steak dinner. Other times it’s a hot dog. Both can be delicious.” A comment left by a Cup of Jo reader named Natalie. Made me laugh.
Calling cards from notable artists. [Kottke]
I’m incredibly distraught that I only have 3 episodes of Netflix’s The Diplomat left. The creator of the show, Debora Cahn, has written for West Wing, Grey’s Anatomy, and Homeland, so if you like any of those shows, you’ll love this one. My friend P described the show as “competency porn”. He’s not wrong.
Also enjoying The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel, Succession, and Ted Lasso. I also watched Ghosted on Apple TV starring Chris Evans and Ana de Armas. It’s predictable and glossy, but it was a fun watch and I screamed-laughed when a series of cameos appeared.
Roxane Gay has been using her newsletter, The Audacity., to feature emerging writers. “The Closet Has Teeth” is written by a once closeted gay man and it’s both brutal and elegant at the same time. My favorite line: “We escape the closet in our own time. But the closet has teeth, and it chews men to pulp. Some of us make it out but forever carry the marks of teeth and nails.”
I don’t know how people keep their bedside tables neat. Mine is overrun with allergy meds, half-read books, post-its, pens, Lexapro, etc etc. At least I’m able to keep my power cords in order. I recently got a weighted cord keeper that sits placidly on my nightstand without any adhesive. Also I’m quite serious about the Lexapro. I accidentally spilled a bottle once and I’m still finding little white pills morning and night. [Amazon]
Recipes I’ve recently saved: Coconut custard pudding from the Monocle and Carrot Lox from
. I want to make this char siu roasted cauliflower but there's been a shortage at my store. Wish me luck today!I have a silicone brush that came with my set of spatulas. It does the job, but I’ve heard this goat hair pastry brush is preferred by sushi chefs, including Jiro.
I ordered a Beater Blade so I don’t have to always stop and scrape the sides of the bowl. Gonna give it a whirl this weekend! [Amazon]
Unlike traditional pen pouches that lay horizontal, this pen pouch has a flat bottom and converts into a stand when you pull the upper half down. [Jet Pens]
This is a very cheery coffee mug and I like how large the handle is. [Omoi]
“My taste is basic. So what?” I like what I like! [Harper’s Bazaar]
Someone invite me to more parties! I recently ordered these ATP cutout heeled sandals and these D’accori satin pumps, and they need to be SEEN.
The Gilder Center at the Natural History Museum looks incredible. [NY Times]
Kids of Immigrants is an apparel brand started by 2 first-generation Americans. I get HYPEBEAST with a little flower child. Wear your pride on your sleeve, chest, or head.
I feel it would be irresponsible to simply link to Adrienne Maree Brown’s powerful poem, because YOU MUST READ IT. I want it to wash over you, seep into the cracks you’ve spent your whole life trying to fill and harden, and make you FEEL IT.
“at the door” by Adrienne Maree Brown
don’t shoot
there is a black boy at the door
looking for his siblingsdon’t shoot
there is a young black man
ringing the doorbelldon’t shoot
there is a brother at the door
looking for his familydon’t shoot
there is a baby at the door
trynna get homedon’t shoot
there is life at the door
moving towards lifedon’t shoot
there is a neighbor at the door
there is a need at the door
there is a person at the door
there is a future at the door
there is a story at the door
you can help write it
towards coming home
towards a safe ending
towards a next breathoh holy hell
don’t knock
don’t get lost
don’t needdon’t seek
don’t run out of gas
don’t let your phone diedon’t go for a walk
don’t go for a drive
don’t play on the playgrounddon’t blast your music
don’t laugh out loud
don’t let them see youdon’t have a heart attack
don’t wonder, or wander
don’t approach with innocensedon’t center with a deep breath
don’t pray as you ring the bell
don’t smile as you realize your mistakedon’t make any mistakes
don’t whistle
don’t flirt
don’t rest down your vigilance
don’t be you
don’t be seen
don’t breathe
don’t even breathe
child, there is a hunter
at the door
I love you.
What a devastating poem. Thanks for sharing it.